Annette T 10:48am Aug 21 2019
Well...I had my nine week appointment yesterday. Wasn't expecting much and that proved to be a good thing, since there are still no signs of bone healing evident on the xrays even without my cast on. Dr continues to assure me that this is completely normal at this stage.
That honestly didn't bother me...what tore me up and continues to haunt me is the sight of my broken leg. I just wasn't prepared to see it look so god awful.
9 weeks in this cast has taken away all muscle - leg resembles a small tree twig just barely holding on. My ankle is non-existent due to the incredible amounts of swelling everywhere. I have ZERO range of motion in my foot/ankle. My brain was telling my foot to move and it literally just stayed there staring at me. I just felt so unprotected for that hour waiting for the xrays. I have been crying since. No one understands why this is so upsetting for me.
I am frightened beyond belief that I may never walk again. How on earth can that happen with this small limb that doesn't even move? And don't forget the fact that my freaking bones aren't healing, so who knows how long I'll be in a cast. Months and months and months... I just don't know how to accept this and be POSITIVE. I just don't think I can and I don't know how much more I can handle.
This new cast (black in color since the healing purple did me NO good for 9 weeks) is so incredibly tight. Last night I thought I was going to lose my leg from the lack of circulation. I was experiencing muscle cramps every time I wiggled my toes. Which takes a lot now to wiggle them. I called the dr this morning and told them that this cast is WAY TOO TIGHT.
Went back and they cut the cast vertically all the way down and spread it open some to hopefully allow for a little "movement", a little "give" with the swelling. They also said because they had to re-position my foot yesterday that could be the cause for the muscle spams and cramping. They wrapped the cut cast in an ace bandage.
I return to the dr in 3 weeks - hopefully I can live through this awful new cast and make it. Dr said I could have gone in a boot but he was hesitant because of the possibility of bone movement. Of course I don't want my bones to move at all so I opted for another cast. Wondering if I should have gone with the boot. Guess I'll have to wait and see what another 3 weeks brings. Apparently I misunderstood him at my last appointment because this time he said at 12 weeks and 6 days I could start using a bone stimulation machine. My next appointment is 12 weeks and 3 days since injury so hopefully that is something that can start pretty soon after. We didn't get into the specifics yet and how it all works but maybe that is a little sliver of something that can jump start the healing process for me? I don't know.
I asked Dr again about walking and he said that I will walk again. No crystal ball as to when that will happen. Dr said to leave the worrying up to him and that he isn't worried. Dr told me to stop reading Dr Google.
Need things to get better...
Happy healing to all.